'Grimm' Recap: 'Once We Were Gods'

Photos Courtesy NBC
BY MELISSA HARKNESS

Are you my Mummy?

Opening Quote: “You shall not become corrupt, you shall not become putrid, you shall not become worms.”

We open this new episode of "Grimm" with some construction workers breaking down a brick wall in some miscellaneous building somewhere. Behind the wall, lies a secret chamber containing a crate that appears to have arrived in 1946. Given that some miscellaneous Egyptian type stuff is lying around, they call in an archaeologist. This person, I shall henceforth dub Bad Scientist Lady, happily has them open not only the crate, but the jackal-headed sarcophagus it contains as well. Let me say it again...she has them open an ancient Egyptian sarcophagus in some dirty room full of construction debris.

Bad Scientist Lady is from the Meriwether University’s Institute of Archaeology and she’s made the news. Two angry young men are watching the newscast with sneering faces. They think she’s irritating too. They commence ranting about grave robbers and the like while Bad Scientist Lady reveals that the sarcophagus hieroglyphs claim that Anubis, the God of the Dead resides inside. The two men have no trouble climbing up a drain pipe and entering the lab, so they are obviously Wesen. They may have gotten away with it, but Robert had to stop and spray some graffiti on the wall. I guess he doesn’t like Meriwether University either. A guard hears and investigates, running right into the two jackal-headed boys. The artist gets shot in the scuffle and dies on the floor, while Karl shoots the other guard and escapes.

Sgt. Wu is still in the mental institution drawing pictures of Aswangs during arts and crafts hour. His so-called friends are still discussing the pros and cons of letting him in on the secret. Hank is still the only one that seems to be on Wu’s side. Everyone else is still spouting their pathetic excuses for keeping him in the dark. Since Wu does most of his actual police work for them, it would probably be in Nick’s best interest to read him in on the whole Wesen thing, but whatever. When this fun is over, Portland’s finest Detectives show up to see him. Nick is being quite a jerk, “Hopefully he can talk to us this time.” he snarks. You know, I don’t really like Nick anymore. His Grimmtasticness has gone to his head. Maybe creepy baby will eat him. While Wu doesn’t remember their previous visit, he hasn’t lost his sense of humor at least. Nick and Hank have barely sat down when they get called away to the University murder. I suppose, we’ll get to see what was spray painted on the wall.

Prof. Vera Gates aka Bad Scientist Lady, is terribly concerned that these ruffians have damaged her marvelous find. She opens the sarcophagus once again, and we get to see that there is a jackal-headed mummy inside as expected. But they haven’t taken the wraps off yet to see if it’s just a normal dead guy or not. Don’t worry, I’m sure they’ll do that very scientifically too. Incidentally, she tells them what the spray painted hieroglyphs on the wall mean, “I protect the dead." Interestingly enough, they were also seen in King Tut’s tomb.

Since Nick can’t ever figure anything out on his own, he and Hank pay Monroe and Rosalee a visit. They learn that the Egyptian gods were Wesen of course. When he tells them about the graffiti, Monrosalee look concerned. They consult with each other before turning back to the perpetually clueless members of the Grimm Gang. They suspect the two men are Beati Paoli, a Sicilian Vendetta Society whose purpose is to protect Wesen culture. They then go on to adamantly proclaim themselves sympathetic to the cause. It is a grotesque sacrilege to display this mummy in its Wesen form. Of course, I’m thinking it was pretty bad of whoever drugged up this guy back in the day and scared him enough to keep him transformed in order to mummify him. This all requires more research! Monrosalee has to pass on the obligatory trip to the Trailer though; the wedding planner is coming. As Nick, Hank, and Girl Friday Juliette leave, Monroe sadly wonders what happened to his people. “We were gods once” he murmurs. The pair of Wesen briefly consider informing the Wesen Council, but decide the news coverage is enough notice for them.

Guess what wonders they find in the Trailer now? Film. The only thing we learn beside the fact that Nick’s ancestor’s were jerks, is that Nick can even see Wesen transform on film. To sum it up, Nick’s ancestor tortured an Anubis (jackal-headed Wesen) to get him to tell him that the ancient pharaohs tortured Wesen in order to mummify them in their Anubis inform. Being buried with a mummified Anubis would insure that the pharaoh became a god himself. The Beati Paoli the Grimm was torturing said that he was trying to take the mummy in order to give it a ceremonial burial. The old Grimm told him he would take care of it and then killed him. Such compassion is truly noteworthy. All this leads them to realize that Karl will try to steal the mummy again. Really? I thought he would just give up and go home.

Monroe and Rosalee are closing up the shop when they get an ominous visitor. It’s Alexander, the assassin from the Wesen Council and he wants to talk to the Grimm. Being the ever helpful Blutbad, Monroe puts in a terrified call for Nick who is paying another visit to the University. It seems that Bad Scientist Lady has finally taken an x-ray of the mummy and discovers that it really is an Anubis. She can’t find any signs that it’s fake. Wow, maybe she’ll get a journal article out of it?

Let’s take a quick break to Austria. Meisner is still in the rustic cabin with Adalind and the offspring. He is out gathering firewood when he hears a heartbeat and a crying baby. It’s Creepy Baby lying all alone in her blankie. He scoops her up and hurries back to the cabin, only to find Adalind holding her own Creepy Baby. When Meisner looks down, his baby has turned into a bundle of firewood which he hurriedly puts in the fireplace. As he describes the experience to Adalind, she is reminded of the time the doctor thought she heard two heartbeats and only one baby. Then the wood in the fireplace bursts into flames all by itself. I think Creepy Baby was cold, and she was telling Meisner to hurry up.

While Meisner is being terrified by a baby, Prince Viktor is busy terrifying Sebastian. He has decided that the traitor has to be poor brave Sebastian, and he wants to know who he’s been working with. They decide that waterboarding is a good enough method and Prince Viktor even makes a bad joke about the situation being very “fluid." Eventually, Sebastian gives up the location of where he dropped off Meisner and Adalind and the Verrat give chase. Prince Viktor even comes along for the hunt dressed up in a lot of tweed. Luckily, after not being able to reach Sebastian for two days, Renard calls to warn them. The threesome is gone when the Prince and crew arrive.

Back in Portland, Juliette decides to visit Wu. She does something moderately helpful by telling him about her trip on the crazy train. I do hope they aren’t going to make Wu go through that as well. The epically long horror that was Juliette’s story line is more than I can take right now. Anyway, she seems to offer him some comfort so that’s something to work with.

Alexander and Nick meet up at Monroe’s house. It seems that he wants Nick to help him with a little problem. The Beati Paoli problem, specifically. He explains to Nick that the Council doesn’t normally get in their way and reiterated that displaying Wesen remains is disrespectful. But since he killed a guard, the Council believes he must be stopped. Essentially, the Council wants Nick to kill Karl, while Nick claims that he absolutely won’t do it. Can we please get Nicky Boy to pick a freaking side. He kills Wesen all the time when it suits him. Ultimately suspicious of his motives, Hank looks into Alexander some more. It seems that he has actually been in town for three days, not the one night that he told them.

When Bad Scientist Lady goes missing, they figure that Karl is using her to get the mummy. They would be right. As the detectives get to the lab building, Nick tells Hank not to call for back-up. They are going to have to deal with this themselves. Sounds like Nick is perfectly happy to kill Karl, despite his protestations to Alexander. While they slowly make their way to the actual lab, Hank gets a call that Alexander’s car is parked behind the very building they are in. I’m shocked, aren’t you? Who you gonna call? Monrosalee!

At home, Monroe is freaking out that the Council knows about their relationship with Nick. Nick of course picks this moment to call and ask for help. “Oh god, what are we doing now?” Rosalee asks as Monroe agrees to help the Grimm once more. My thoughts exactly Rosalee. Nick wants them to go spy on Alexander obviously. It makes no never mind that Monroe was just professing himself concerned about crossing the Council’s assassin. They rush off to help anyway.

Karl and Bad Scientist Lady finally arrive in the lab holding our dead Anubis. Karl gets himself worked up again about the sacrilege taking place and is about to do her some harm when the Grimm Cavalry arrives. So he throws her at them. Luckily for all of us, she hits her head and spends the rest of the time unconscious on the floor. Just to show us that he’s not the bad guy, Nick and Hank beat up Karl and arrest him.

While they are busy getting him into a patrol car, Alexander sneaks in and steals the Anubis mummy. Like a good little puppy, Monroe dutifully reports this to Nick. The Grimm suavely opens Alexander’s car door and just takes a seat. The two then engage in some suave mutual threats before agreeing to give the poor tortured Anubis a decent burial. Hank finds the funeral pyre to be oddly touching. I find this entire episode to be oddly irritating, but rumor has it that Mama Grimm is coming back soon. At least we have that to keep us going.

The next episode of "Grimm," "The Show Must Go On" airs Friday, March 21 at 9 p.m. ET on NBC.