Friday, February 14, 2014

Valentine's Day Horror Fest Part 2: The Zombie Edition

BY NOWAL MASSARI

Last year we gave you a list of scary movies to enjoy with your sweetie. If you aren't the type of person that turns to mush over a box of gamble chocolates and some over-priced flowers, but don't want to watch something too scary, we've got a list of heart warming zombie movies to help you celebrate Valentine's day. 

The film is told from the prospective of lead zombie R (Nicholas Hoult), who narrates what it’s like to (un)live in a post-apocalyptic world. After making a meal out of the brains of beautiful Julie’s jerk boyfriend, R begins to take on the memories of her departed love. R’s humanity eventually seems to return as he spends more time with Julie. However, like any other love story, the duo face obstacles that could tear them apart, both figuratively and literally. 

This light hearted tale of love and life after death is definitely cute, surprisingly entertaining, and with a PG-13 rating, it has just the right amount of darkness to please the whole family! 
Shaun (Simon Pegg) is a directionless man-child, preferring to spend his life in the same routine from day to day; work, a round of video games with best friend Ed (Nick Frost) and going down to the Winchester for a couple of pints. Unfortunately, Shaun’s girlfriend Liz doesn’t share his love of this mundane routine, so she dumps him. After spending an evening with Ed, drowning his sorrows in beer, Shaun awakens to find that the zombie apocalypse is upon them. Stepping up, Shaun becomes a leader and will stop at nothing to protect the ones he loves.

Shaun of the Dead has got a bit of everything; romance, humor, zombies, fight scenes and the music of Queen! Be warned, this R-rated modern classic has a fair amount of blood, gore and swearing, so snuggle up with your sweetie and watch it after the kiddies are tucked in.

Young Freddy is pretty excited about his new job, until a barrel of top secret ooze, “Trioxin,” falls over and the gas within begins to reanimate the dead! While Freddy and a couple co-workers are trying to defend themselves from brain eating corpses, his girlfriend Tina is hanging out with a rebellious group of young punk rockers in the cemetery across the street. Soon enough, acid rain begins to fall and the kids are attacked by the living dead. Poor Freddy ends up with a nasty case of the zombie flu after prolonged exposure to the toxic chemical, but that doesn’t stop his lady love from sticking by his side until the end. 

This Romero-esque b-flick actually introduced the idea of zombies as brain eating monsters and gave zombiphiles one of the greatest undead villains in cinema, Tarman. With a rockin’ soundtrack and plenty of laughs, this R-rated gem is definitely one to watch. A nude, grave dancing Linnea Quigley doesn’t hurt either.

In this British zom-com, six friends band together to help their buddy Vince ease the pain of his recent divorce. The boys hire Candy, a sexy minibus driver, to take them to the small town of Moodley, where the women purportedly outnumber the men 4 to 1. Upon their arrival, they notice that not only are there no women around, but NO one seems to be around at all. After a quick look around, they come across a soldier attacking a young girl and a violent scuffle ensues. Fortunately for the group, they realize that they had been fighting the wrong side just in time. The soldier reveals that all of the women in the town have become infected with a biological agent that turns them into violent, cannibalistic monsters. A military experiment gone horribly awry only gets worse for the gents as “phase 2” commences and they slowly run out of safe places to hide. 

While it’s not your typical zombie flick, “Doghouse” brings the gore as well as the laughs. Who would have thought that you could turn a super soaker into a flame thrower? So grab your sweetheart and get ready for some decent scares and hearty laughs.

Zombie cards available at Think Geek
In an alternate reality, 1950s America has survived the zombie apocalypse. To curb their insatiable hunger for living humans and turn the undead into servants or pets, corporate made Zomcon collars are the latest necessity. Everything is going a-ok for residents of Willard, until the collar of Fido- a middle aged man who died of a myocardial infarction only to be reanimated as the servant and pet of the Robinson family- malfunctions, causing him to bite the neighbor. The neighbor becomes a zombie herself, only to be destroyed by little Timmy Robinson, but only after she bites someone, creating a small outbreak. After tracing it back to Fido, Zomcon takes him away to labor in their factory. With the help of Mr. Theopolis and his mother Helen, who has often wished she had met Fido before the Zombie Wars, Timmy heads to the Zomcon factory to rescue his dearly departed friend. The evil corporation isn’t about to let Fido go so easily, and after some serious danger, balance and happiness are restored to the Robinsons and the town of Willard. 

Touted as a cross between “Night of the Living Dead” and “Lassie,” this film is bound to give you a weird case of the warm fuzzies. If you’re not convinced that this isn’t a story worthy of Valentine’s day, take a closer look at Mr. Theopolis. A former Zomcon employee who was fired for his love of his female zombie, whom he has kept remarkably well preserved. Then there is the tension between Mrs. Robinson and our anti-hero, Fido. But you’ll have to watch it to see how it ends!

Whether you're cuddled up with that special someone, or boycotting the day entirely, we're pretty sure that at least one of these movies is guaranteed to put a smile on your face and fill your dark heart with a bit of joy. 

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