'True Blood' Recap: 'I Found You'

Courtesy HBO

Jason has a hot sex dream about Eric. He must be lurking around somewhere instead of being burnt up like they lead us to believe at the end of last season. I’ll spare you the details. It’s really one of those things you have to see for yourself. You know, shirtless sexy guys.

Sookie finally decided to tell Sam and Andy that she found a dead body after she heard everyone’s thoughts. Her theory is that they identify the dead girl she found in the woods and track her body back to wherever she came from to find out where all of those vampires are coming from. Really, it can’t hurt since three out of the four remaining members of the Bon Temps police force are right there and well, not too bright. Sam suggests that everyone be of service.

I was wrong about the infected vampires. They have the same reasoning skills of regular vampires or humans. The reason why they have everyone tied up in the basement is to ration their food supplies. They realize that they are going to die as well. Unfortunately, they all look like they were in the Buffy the Vampire Slayer movie.

The jerk that ate up Kevin is demoted, and a former teacher is promoted to meal patrol. When she walks downstairs, Arlene recognizes her as her and Holly’s kids former teacher. Arlene thinks this is why they don’t pick her for dinner, but I’m not so sure. This is the second time that Arlene has been passed over. What’s up with that?

Lettie Mae goes to look after LaFayette, but really she wants him to help her connect with Tara. No doubt, Lettie Mae is a crackhead.

Andy, Jason, Sam, Sookie, and Alcide find the dead body in the woods. They find out that she is from a neighboring town, Saint Alice, and decide to take a trip out there to see what’s going on since no one in THE WHOLE TOWN, apparently, is answering the phone. Once they finally get to Saint Alice, they realize it’s a ghost town. No one is walking through the streets or in any of the buildings downtown. Is it possible that the whole town has been infected or killed? Sam climbs on top of the fence and sees a “FEMA HELP” sign. It’s looking a lot like "The Walking Dead" in Saint Alice. There’s a pit of dead bodies in the middle of town that looks like it smells pretty bad.

Vince starts running amuck in Sam’s absence, telling everyone that Sam is a dirty dog. He riles everyone up, and despite Sam’s warning, they all decide to take matters into their own hands. Those Bon Temps residents have no minds of their own. They start ripping the former Merlotte’s apart and crafting makeshift weapons. Adalyn hears townspeople’s ideas to come take over the weapons at the sheriff’s office. Adalyn goes to warn Kenya that they are going to overthrow her.

The townspeople play mind games with Kenya which causes her to turn the guns over to the idiots. Adilyn gets her fairy light power and zaps Kenya which pisses her off. Kenya ends up throwing Adilyn in jail which alerts sleeping Jessica. Unfortunately it’s 1:30 P.M., so she can’t help Adilyn. Jessica tries calling everyone, but Andy’s in Saint Alice and Sookie threw her phone in the woods.
Arlene finally gets the teacher’s attention and tries to sweet talk her into giving her mercy. Holly gets in on it and starts playing the sick woman’s emotions. Arlene finally starts begging her to help them escape.

Sookie, et al. enter the home of the dead girl. Jason’s highly refined pallet discovers that everyone has been dead or gone for two days based on the age of the pizza lying around. Andy decides he’s going to make an honest woman out of Holly. Sookie starts plundering the dead girl’s diary which reminds her of when she first met Bill. It’s pretty obvious from this flashback that Bill used to have bad hair, and Sookie used to have an even worse accent. Alcide is no dummy, and he realizes that Sookie is thinking about her past. I mean, she has been with literally every mythical creature. She finally keeps on reading which reveals that it was the sick vampires that was the cause of the townsfolk’s disappearance. The trip to Saint Alice has revealed everyone’s insecurities. Sam’s worried about his unborn baby. Andy’s worried about Holly. Sookie is worried that everyone in town is right. Jason, well, he knows that pizza is two days old.

Lettie Mae is a crackhead and decides that she’ll hurt herself so that Willa will have no choice but to give her blood. Once she’s fully V-ed out, she hallucinates about Tara being on a cross with snakes around her. Old, stupid, crackhead, Lettie Mae.

Alcide tells Sookie that it’s not her fault that all of the vampires were drawn to Bon Temps and that she’s not like Mary Alice. He says it’s human nature for people to be drawn to vampires. He suggests that they get out of Bon Temps, but Sookie wants to stick around. Once they get home, Sookie convinces Alcide to take a shower, and she goes to find Bill. She wants to make sure that he can still sense her fear if she gets into deep doodie.

Andy comes home to find Adilyn missing. Jessica explains that she didn’t eat Adilyn, and that she will find her after nightfall.

Smaller Bites:
-Shocker of the year (not really): Eric is infected in Rhone Valley, France. Pam goes to retrieve him.
-Lettie Mae’s wig is still bad.
-What was up with that sex dream between Eric and Jason? New developments or old lingering blood?
-Ummmm, what is coursing through Arlene’s blood to cause that teacher vamp to die?

Tune in at 9 p.m. ET for next Sunday's new "True Blood" episode, “Fire in the Hole.” Here's the synopsis and a sneak peek:

Sookie (Anna Paquin) hatches a dangerous plan to take down the H-Vamps, even as Vince (Brett Rickaby) and his armed vigilantes pose an equally serious threat. Lafayette (Nelsan Ellis) gets high with James (Nathan Parsons); Jason (Ryan Kwanten) eyes a family future with Violet (Karolina Wydra); Willa (Amelia Rose Blaire) is forced to find a new place to stay; Sarah Newlin (Anna Camp) sheds her past. Pam (Kristin Bauer van Straten) offers Eric (Alexander SkarsgĂ„rd) a compelling reason to return to Louisiana – and be the vampire he used to be.
Written by Brian Buckner; directed by Lee Rose.