Astronomers Predicting Zombies in Space

Image Courtesy Drinkin'&Drive-In

The debate over whether or not there is life outside of our own solar system is long and unending. However, astronomers Stephen Kane and Franck Zelziz are taking another approach to the theory of intelligent life in space, by exploring the idea of zombies inhabiting other planets.

According to io9, the astronomical duo recently published a study that suggests there are over 2,500 planets overrun with zombies within 100 parsecs, or 326 lightyears, of our own solar system. Seem outlandish? Well, they've got some evidence to back up their predictions. To break it down, they state that considering the high likelihood of non-human life in the universe, that it is equally plausible that these other life forms have also been affected by the same disastrous earth pandemics, such as the plague, smallpox, and Spontaneous Necro-Animation Psychosis, or SNAP, which is also known as "Zombie-ism." On SNAP and the possibility of extraterrestrial undead, they state:

"The projected frequency of SNAP planets explains a contradiction which has long troubled the proposition that intelligent life is common: the Fermi Paradox. This premise of the paradox is that the timescale for extraterrestrial civilizations to spread throughout the galaxy is small compared with stellar lifetimes and so we should have encountered our neighbors by now. Our work here shows the resolution of the paradox to be quite simple. The desolation of a civilization requires only that they encounter a case of SNAP during their exploration phase and their entire civilization will collapse. Let us not repeat history by rushing in to where our predecessors ought to have feared to tread."

So, following this train of thought, they believe that it is entirely possible that we haven't been able to communicate with other beings due to their destruction at the hands of a "zombie" apocalypse! While it seems unlikely, it is an extremely interesting theory. I know that I would personally be ok with never coming face to face with a space zombie. If you're curious, read the study and let us know your thoughts!

-Nowal Massari

Genpets, the 'Bioengineered Buddies' Coming to a Retailer Near You?

"I love you, nightmare mutant baby!
Please don't eat my face while I sleep!"

Do you desperately want a pet, but you're cursed with allergies? Or perhaps you don't find yourself with enough time to devote to a lovable critter? Well, the folks at Bio-Genica have you covered. In the very near future, you will be able to go to a local retail store and purchase a Genpet! At first glance, they look like an extremely advanced Pet Rock or Giga Pet. Their package has cute little air holes and feeding tubes, making it appear that these alien-looking creatures are alive in some kind of space age hyper sleep. Well, they are. These are actual, living beings and that's just the tip of the nightmare iceberg.

According to the website, "Genpets are living, breathing mammals. Bio-Genica is a Bioengineering Company that has combined, and modified existing DNA to create the Genpets lineup. Genpets have blood, bones, and muscle; they will bleed if you cut them, and die if mistreated just like any other animal. The electronic components are only in the packages and are for basic life support, outside of the packages the Genpets are wholly organic." Just to clarify, yes, these are living creatures that will be sold on retail shelves.