'Being Human' Recap: 'Old Dog New Tricks'

Photos courtesy of Syfy

"Being Human" is back and in a big way! A lot happened tonight so let's get to it.

Sally awakes from a soothing cucumber nap to the sound of Donna asking for the magazine. Sally has no idea where she is or why she is wearing nothing but towels, but it's a very lovely day spa. Donna is also in a towel and this might be a good time for everyone to freshen their drinks.

The scene shifts to Aidan running through the woods and it looks like he's approaching top vampire speed being chased by a very angry wolf. He yells for Nora to grab the gun. She grabs the loaded gun and in a well-rehearsed dance, dashes into a barn and releases a goat to lure the wolf into the stall. They lock him in and Nora ruefully observes that she could be in Italy on her honeymoon yet is here
leading her husband on with a goat and living out of an RV. She and Aidan discuss that Josh seems to be getting stronger and faster. What happens the day Aidan can't outrun him? Aidan tries to calm her by reminding her that Josh is trapped and scared but he's confident they can help him. Aidan also believes that he can help anybody, anytime, so I'm "Team Nora" right now.

Back in Rebirth Day Spa, Sally is more calm and Donna goes over it again: Donna brought them there through Sally's death spot but Sally created the place. Sally freaks out, Donna explains, Sally makes a happy place - it's the Circle of Afterlife. Sally's not buying that she can do that, she's not the witch after all. Personally, my happy place would have included wine and a library but to each her own. Ghostly reality starts to seep through as Sally pulls her arm out of the pool covered in blood and sits up leaving her towel behind. Good thing she has strategically placed her arm over her chest.

Returning to the Trailer of Tears, Nora primps in what amounts to little more than a long shirt and
goes to see Josh, who is once again human, and is getting dressed which was a waste of motion as Nora has no intention of letting their time go to waste. They have about a half an hour and get right to business in the barn. It's a sign I'm old when all I can think about is how scratchy that hay is. Apparently Josh has reverse werewolfitis (thanks Liam!) where he's only human a short time a month and this is doing nothing good for his mental, not to mention marital, state.

Sally is trying to get it together; she knows that she and Donna are linked because 'you ate me and I broke you' but doesn't want to be there anymore. She wants to go home. Donna explains that they've both cheated final death too many times so when the death spot was destroyed, her pulling them through there created a holding cell of sorts until Donna can figure out a way to end both of their existences. Well that will certainly put a damper on their relationship now... and they were doing so nicely sharing spa services.

Josh walks out of the barn to join Aidan at a campfire outside the trailer and they hug it out. Giving Josh some time to come back to himself, Aidan gives him a beer. Aidan, I know he's your friend and all but giving booze to someone struggling with the horror of not being himself is probably not the best way to help. They spend some time discussing supernatural reproduction habits, as bros do. It appears that both Boston's vampire and werewolf communities have been decimated in the recent war but they are skirting the main issue - Josh doesn't want to be a burden to them - they have careers, lives - it's not fair to Nora and he's scared, he wants Aidan to end it. Aidan has a silver knife but calls Josh's bluff; he's not ready to go yet and the hope Nora has that he'll come back is all that's keeping her sane. Josh has traded whiny for angsty and with the beard, I'm not sure it's a change for the better. Aidan has been invited to a faculty party with Kat and Josh tells him to go, he'll be fine, he's just coming to grips with returning to himself. Aidan leaves because he makes terrible decisions and Josh broods, in a manly way, to the fire.

Sally is fired up, she's ready to go and is working out a plan. Since her death spot was destroyed, she reasons she can get out through Donna's death spot. Donna scoffs at this, pinning Sally to a wall. Sally retaliates by tying Donna to her spa bed with roots and all of a sudden, the Hermione Granger analogy is spot on. A funnel appears in the pool-o-blood and Sally figures this is her chance and jumps...into a noose that is hanging in a ShopMart. The shoppers shift to Puritans who are quite alarmed that the hanged witch is still not dead. The scene shifts back and forth a few times until Sally rids herself of the noose and is less than impressed that Donna's death spot was in a ShopMart. If that is anything like the WalMart near my house I'd be ashamed too. She has no idea how to get home and given that Salem isn't terribly far from Boston, Donna is hundreds of years old and is a witch, we can probably assume she was hung for being a witch.

At the faculty party with Kat, Aidan is clearly enjoying not being covered in sweat and blood and is having a lovely evening when he spots who he thinks is his long dead wife Suzanna. He excuses himself to find her and Suzanna uses the opportunity to check out her competition giving the name 'Diana'.

Commercials! I have seen the "I, Frankenstein" trailer about ten times now and still have no idea who I'm supposed to be rooting for.

'Diana' has a strong interest in Kat and Aidan as they are young and everyone else is old and boring and Kat finds nothing creepy about this because the wine is singing her song. Memories of Suzanna's death swim to the surface and Aidan has a hard time returning from his partial vamp-out. Kat comes to find him with the tale of the weird woman who has now disappeared. She might be too dumb to be left alive. Aidan says that his shift got changed to a double and he has to go.

A human Josh enters the trailer and finds a calendar with amounts due, bills, and spreadsheets strewn across the table. He reads them looking unhappier by the second. Clearly the energy and resources they are expending helping him are coming at a terrible price. He looks like a man resigned to his fate.

In the brownhouse, sexy times are happening and geez, can anyone keep their shirts on this episode? In the middle of it, Kat's face changes to Suzanna and he then proceeds to have a conversation with her. Really, Aidan?  That's the moment Sally picks to make her triumphant return to the land of the living. Good to see her voyeuristic tendencies survived intact. Turns out Aidan was having a very, very good dream and that pillow is probably going to need a cigarette and a good washing.

Commercials! If my kids don't want to see "The Lego Movie," I will pay someone to go with me.

Sally recounts her adventures in the land of Time-out-of-Time and while Aidan is delighted that she's back, if not in the location she chose to appear, but what's a little nudity between friends? He's concerned that she'll end up in more trouble and with the Josh issue, ain't nobody got time for that! Donna was undoubtedly a very bad person, nothing she said was untrue technically. Sally pooh-poohs this, she's got the power and wants to see Josh.

Josh and Nora are waking in their cells and Nora tearfully confides that she doesn't know how much longer she can do this. She wants to help, is trying to help, but feels so powerless. Josh reassures her that they'll figure it out together and she leaves. He goes to chain himself in but then doesn't. Is he testing himself or forcing a confrontation?

Aidan agrees to take Sally and they surprise Nora who remembers at the last second that Sally is no longer corporeal so hugging will just be awkward for everyone. They go to visit Josh...who is no longer there. Everyone runs out with Aidan yelling to Nora to get the tranquilizer. Maybe you better wear that thing all time is what I'm saying.

Commercials! "Opposite Worlds" is coming soon and if you think there is any suspense over which side has it better then we can't be friends anymore but thankfully "Face-Off" returns tomorrow so be sure to tune in for Larissa's recap immediately following the show.

They are running through the woods looking for Wolf-Josh when Aidan lets slip that Josh is doing this to force them into the position of killing him. Suprisingly, Nora doesn't take this very well. Wolf-Josh corners them on a little footbridge and Aidan makes the heroic decision to not use the silver knife. Wolf-Josh is not impressed and prepare to jump when Sally immobilizes him with fire and Nora tags him with the tranquilizer. They're feeling goodish the situation is under control when Sally disappears to another woods or a different version of the woods. Safe in the barn stall, Josh and Nora look at each other sadly.

Aidan finally gets to work where he sees a funeral home van pulled up outside and spots Blake with the recently departed. He reminds her that his hospital is off limits for poaching but the old rules no longer apply; he's free, just like he always wanted. There's a new regime in town and she's low man. They're building a new vampire army now that the virus has passed; his services are no longer required. It turns out that the new boss is...Kenny. Looking much better than he was the last time we saw him. Fresh air and exercise can do that to a person. Blake reassures Kenny that Aidan doesn't know he's 'alive' still and apparently does not give Kenny the respect he deserves. I'm really looking forward to discovering how he came to be running Boston - his Minecraft skills must be amazing.

In Sally's woods she sees a door at  the end of a long hallway, following it she comes upon a circle of women chanting with a girl tied to a bed struggling against her bonds. One of the women lifts a knife to sacrifice the girl and Sally yells 'NO!' It appears that since Sally returned via Donna's death spot, she will be pulled to various aspects of Donna's life. How she manages this will be quite a ride. Will she be paying for Donna's sins? Or will she have the ability to change things? Does exercising her growing powers trigger the jump to Donna's past? Given that the theme this season is your past coming back to haunt your present, the former is much more likely but that doesn't mean that Sally won't try.

Commercials! Little Ceaser's pizza is a step up from DiGiorno's but not quite Dominos.

Aidan is back in bed with Kat for real this time when she drops the 'L' bomb on him. She owns it and makes no apologies and I like her a teeny bit better now. She leaves, he gets dressed and opens the door to find...Suzanna.

Next week: Aidan and Suzanna reconnect after a few hundred years apart, Josh and Nora's woes are just beginning, Sally's lost again and Bishop returns!